Today's top ten are reasons why it's time to stop watching Flavor of Love. I don't know about you, but this is an embarrassment to me. Aint a damn thing funny about this show. First I must say I blame BET for setting the coonery standard with those damned music videos. Second I blame Viacom for passing the tradition on to MTV and VH1. Finally I blame Chuck D. for not containing this fool. You brought that moon cricket into our world, now take him out. Reasons.... the reasons that were hear!
10. The Bad Acting- The tears, the fights, and the WIGGERS (no explanation needed, Buckwild). If one more nut case proclaims her love for Flav I am going to scream. I can't......I just can't! That face can only be loved by one woman, his Mama!
9. The Coonery-Wowwwwwwwww!!!! This has to be the most ignorant show on TV. Its definitely leading the pack of ignorant shows. This brother who once spoke of black power and respect, is now jigging around in black face (sans the makeup)! Its embarrassing. Pouring champagne out on your rug. I wouldn't even suggest doing that on your lawn let alone in doors on your purple rug. Him kissing the deuces like its 1987. Who does that? The worst moment was a couple of years back when that girl sharted on herself! Just nasty. Ughh! The sistah's are always fighting and getting in each other's face.
8. The Clocks- What is his reasoning for this again? Has he ever stopped and wondered why the rest of the world wears watches? And they are the ugliest clocks at that. Not that a cute clock would do any justice hanging around his neck.
7. Flav's Outfits- The All Red, the all Blue, the all Pink. All of any one color on this man is a travesty. The all Pink really does me in, as if all pink on a man isn't enough, they put it on Flav. Then he has the nerve to accent this outfit with pink slippers. What the "F"? Lets get this brother some browns and beige's to bring out his, dare I say it, outer beauty! Hold on I'm about to puke..............
OK, post puke. I'm Back! Shall we continue?
6. The Girls- There are two groups of girls that are on the show tack heads, and the tack head ho's! And I know some of you fans are saying, well so and so wasn't that bad. Yes she was! They are all hot messes for going on the show. They are all on there for telly time, we know this. However, tell me one person on the show who you think is going to be a star. ??????!!!!!!.......still waiting.
5. Big Rick- What is this big pootie sticks purpose? He just stands there like a big pile O' sh*t with glasses!
4. The Tacky Mansion- Who decorates this cardboard mansion? Sister Patterson?????? The wall paper is the tackiest I have ever seen. And you know they are using the same mansion for all of the VH1 reality love shows. They just change the wall paper when the next show is up. The walls have been everything from leopard print, to Louis Vuitton. Then what mansion doesn't have enough rooms to sleep all the girls solo. What's up with the twin beds in all the rooms? That looks like a single family home to me. Why don't they just get bunk beds.
3. Motivation for other Shows- If you need an example, I love New York, Rock of Love, and Tila Tequila's Shot at Love are a few that come to mind. Anyway who is the genius behind the names of these shows. Further more I don't think I could stand to look at New York's boobs/eyelashes/eye make-up, Bret's Wig/Scarf/Cowboy Hat, or Tila's little light bulb head another minute.
2. Season 4- If we keep watching this coonery, there will be a season 4. It's not their people looking bad. They might be able to use this to justify the return of slavery! Watch your backs, black people! If we are picking cotton or tobacco next week, we know who to blame. Flav and his harem of women! In particular New York, Saaphyri, and the Twins (thing 1 & thing 2)
1. Flav- How does this moon cricket continue to do it? The Sunglasses, the cornrows, the gold fronts, the liger cape (lion mixed with tiger, they really do exist)! Then he has the nerve to be choosy! N*gga please! Always wanting a kiss, ughhh! "Kiss ya man!" Time for another puke break. You get the point. Stop watching this crap.
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